New polling out this week found that just 2% of the population is satisfied with current bullshit levels, indicating that Americans are indeed sick and tired of this bullshit. This comes after years of bullshit relentlessly plaguing the country has left many citizens exhausted.
“Nothings been the same since the bullshit struck,” said Arleen Jo, a web designer based in Austin, Texas.
“It’s invaded our home. It’s all we talk about, it’s all we think about. We’re just frustrated with this unmanageable amount of bullshit!”
Frustrations like Arleen’s seem to have fallen on deaf ears. Despite Americans becoming increasingly outspoken about how burnt out they are of the endless barrage of bullshit, bullshit production has hit record highs across the board. Business Outsider spoke with Stanley Cohen, one of the nation’s leading producers of bullshit to find out why.
“Look, I’m just doin’ my job. If I wasn’t pumping out this bullshit then some other shmuck would be here doin’ it instead! You think I like my job? Do you think I want to be here contributing to this endless river of bullshit? I hate it just as much as the next guy, but it pays well and I’m good at makin’ it,” said Cohen, as he crafted a particularly hot and steamy pile of bullshit.
It seems no matter how sick American citizens are of this bullshit, it’s here to stay. Despite record unpopularity, new models show that bullshit production is set to expand 750% over the next ten years.