Holy Shit: Three Cameras On Phone

CUPERTINO, CA— At Apple’s (NASDAQ: AAPL) annual new product event today, the company shocked the world by revealing the iPhone will feature not two, but three cameras.

After the reveal, fans in the audience collectively gasped and then roared in furious applause as Tim Cook slightly gestured upward with his hands on stage and cracked a faint smile.

“I always have high expectations for these events, especially with all the rumors flying around beforehand,” commented a long-time Apple fan and accountant sitting in the audience as Tim Cook gave his keynote address.

“But three cameras? On one phone? I mean, holy fucking shit, this is just unreal,” he continued excitedly as he tried to preorder the iPhone 11 Pro on his iPhone XS Max.

“There are just some moments in life that you know you’ll remember forever, and this is certainly one of them,” said Tim Cook after the presentation.

“We were thinking to ourselves, what do the people want? And, I am so proud of our team of engineers and designers that had the courage and forethought to add a third camera to the next installment of the legendary iPhone series,” he continued while chuckling.

At press time, Apple’s stock was up 10.2% as investors digested the impact that a third camera will have on the smartphone market and photography trends across the world.

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